I can’t believe that it’s taken me nearly a week to write about my meeting with the saxy sailor. My only excuse is that I’m mentally exhausted right now. I can’t focus on anything for long.

Anyway I met G at Euston Station, and we went into a nearby cafe for a cup of tea. I don’t know what I was expecting, honestly, but he was just like he’d described himself. I hate these blind date kind of meetings, where you’re waiting at the designated meeting place, looking at any guy who could possibly be that person and wondering if it’s going to be the guy with the walking stick who’s limping and looks about 70…

Luckily it wasn’t the septuagenarian who greeted me. I was very nervous at first, almost as skittish as when that male stripper said hello to me after the show… But after a cup of tea I felt a bit more like myself.

From Euston we walked to Camden Town, and walked around the market and the assorted shops in that area. I love going to Camden Town as it’s just such a cool area. G fitted in perfectly there; a little boy even stopped him and told him that his North Face cap was “sick” and asked him where he’d got it from. (He said that he’d picked it up in Norway.)

I didn’t buy anything in Camden - I’d wanted to visit the African drum shop where I’d bought my djembe a few years ago, but it wasn’t there anymore. I’m not sure if it’s been relocated due to the fire that raged in that area several months ago. G bought himself a gangster-style Capello hat after haggling with the shop guy.

After a few hours, I was starving so we stopped at a Chinese buffet restaurant for dinner. He’s a vegetarian, and unfortunately there wasn’t much that he liked from their selection, so I felt a little bit guilty for having 2 plates of food, even if it was lousy food.

After that we walked back to Euston (it was starting to rain a little) and went back to the cafe in the station for a chat before setting off home. It was a nice day, and he was great company.

Overall, I’m still kind of confused about things with G. He’s a lovely guy, and I like him a lot, but I’m not sure whether I could have a relationship with him. The main issue is the age gap - he’s 26 years older than me. It doesn’t seem to bother him at all, and he still thinks that he’s in love with me. In an ideal world it might not matter, but in spite of myself I was thinking about what my family and my friends would say about me being with a guy so much older than me.

G is a guy who does what he wants to do. He’s done a lot and has seen a lot, and he doesn’t have any close ties to anyone who might want to talk him out of what he wants to do. I feel like I’m in the opposite situation, as long as I’m living here I’m not free to do what I want, when I want.

I’ve told G that I think that he’ll teach me a lot about life, but now I’m just wondering where those life lessons may lead me.

I may have fooled around a little bit in my youth, but I’ve never felt much of an attraction to a woman. Until now.

Over the past couple of weeks I’ve developed a girl crush on Britney Spears. The funny thing is, I only fancy her as a brunette.

I had a glimpse of her potential gorgeousness in the video for Toxic, but in Gimme More she spends the entire video writhing around with that glorious dark mane.

The video is a prime example of cheap chic. Thousands of dollars (from Britney’s own coffers) were spent to make this video look like an amateur clip taken on a cameraphone. The tattoo on her arm, those sweet smiles she gives the camera and the hole in her stocking only add to that feeling. It all makes the scenario feel more believable, as if perhaps the whole pop star thing doesn’t work out for Ms Spears, she might choose to earn her living by stripping in a downmarket joint.

I think her stripper name would be Raven…

And after seeing the saucy pics on Samurai Frog’s blog, I must agree with Becca that La Spears is rather pretty all over!
And here’s a slideshow with more pics of our Brits looking lovely:

I don’t know who is going to be the winner of Dirty Cows, but according to this article, the hostess has kept the meal to herself. Yep, Tara Palmer-Tomkinson and Alexy Van Kimmenade are dating, and were getting close even during the filming of the show!

I had a feeling that there was some chemistry between them, and the very perceptive Salty predicted it in a recent comment, but I wouldn’t have expected them to get together so soon…

It’s Mr Right all over again! Though let’s hope it doesn’t have the same ending.

I’ll still watch the show for its bitchiness and entertainment value, but I don’t think I’ll bother with the blow-by-blow reviews, unless anyone really wants me to continue.

Disclaimer: my lawyers have asked me to confirm that Alexy, Tara and Living TV all deny that T&A are dating…

…Let’s tango.

Scene from Nip/Tuck. Soundtrack: Whatever Lola Wants by the Gotan Project

I often said to myself that going to Dirk’s cafe was like walking into an episode of Eastenders, only set in South London. There were the gruff old men with hearts of gold hidden beneath their rough exteriors, a wise old woman who is sharper than she looks, a guy with a limp, a family business and a lecherous married git. I’m not eighteen anymore, so why did I think I was playing the role of Stacey, getting mixed up with a married bloke who had no respect for me other than as a sex object?

I haven’t blogged about this for ages, and my regular readers may have thought that I’d come to my senses and stayed away from Dirk, as I’d intended. If only.

We have shared two more interludes, but we did NOT shag. Of course he wanted to. Part of me wanted to get him out of my system, and the other part of me just enjoyed the attention of an attractive man. There was no chance of us having a relationship, for not only did he have no intention of leaving his wife, but there were no common interests between us except that of the physical. As I said to Veg the other day, this was no meeting of the minds.

And yet, it is over. And I’m glad. My only regret is that I didn’t end it before. My dear reader, you may ask, why should I believe her now, she obviously can’t keep her grubby hands off him? Well, he has succeeding in offending me, which is quite a feat if you know me at all.

Basically I saw him on Friday at lunchtime. He said that he hadn’t been as persistent with me recently as he wanted to “get to know me”. Fair enough I thought, though I hadn’t noticed much change in his predatory behaviour. Then he went on to say that he felt that he didn’t know me so well and claimed to be wondering whether I could have some sort of Sexually Transmitted Disease! Then he said that he thought that I might shag for England in Jamaica, and that he was concerned for me! Such knobbery - if he doesn’t want a STD I’d be happy to cut it off for him!

–

I’m glad to say that I have another suitor waiting in the wings. He reads this blog sometimes and it’s early days in our friendship, so I won’t embarrass him, but is a lovely guy who I admire so much. Watch this space!

I was doing really well until Monday, when I gorged on sweet stuff from the bakery between meetings at work. I’m not too surprised, it’s natural to have bad days, but I need to pick myself up and carry on as before.

Dirk has been relentless in his pursuit of me this week. He came to see me at my workplace to talk things over again. He feels some guilt, but not enough to stop him from pursuing me. When I’m with him I am so weak-willed, I hate myself for it. I was flattered by his attentions, but it would be wrong to proceed further. He is serious about wanting to sleep with me. It’s a slippery road to travel, and I feel that I have more understanding of why some women are tempted to take the next step.

Yesterday afternoon I was coming out of the supermarket near my workplace when I saw Dirk*, the married man, approaching me. After we’d exchanged pleasantries he asked me if I’d like to keep him company next Friday while he repaints the cafe.

“Next Friday?” I said. “As in Good Friday?“
“Yeah.”
“Err..right.”

Don’t worry. I know.

…I’m buying

Yum? Ouch?

And you riders, protect yourselves - that’s what it’s all about really.

Ok, I admit it, I’m a geek. I’ve bought 3 ipods and sold 2 of them. I’ve bought cases, remote controls and other add-ons, but this is the ultimate ipod accessory - a vibrator which vibrates in time to your playlist…

Click on the pic for more info on this item.

I may just have to try the OhMiBod out myself, as scientific research, of course… An Urban Recluse needs to find ways to keep herself amused

It brings a new connotation to the oft-used blogging phrase: What’s currently playing on my ipod…

EDIT: I’ve had so many clicks on this page that I’ve decided to post a couple of ads on the site and try one of these vibes out for reviewing purposes. Check back here soon for updates.