I decided to jump on the weight scales to check out my current weight, which I haven’t checked for several months. I’m much heavier than I thought I was, much heavier than I’ve ever been. It was a real shock, and at this stage I really have to change my lifestyle to safeguard my health. I still can’t believe it.

I know I haven’t blogged much about my love-life lately, partly because I’m not actually dating anyone, and partly because it’s a bloody mess despite that fact.

At the moment I appear to have 3 suitors:

1. A guy who reads this blog, so I can’t say much about him. He doesn’t live in the UK, so nothing much can happen with him for now. (And it’s not Dr Monkey! )
2. A guy I met in Jamaica, who recently informed me that he wants to impregnate me! Like that’s ever going to happen.
3. Dirk Dastardly. He came to my workplace recently and told me that he still wants me (again). Yet again I said no. He told me that he’d had some doubts about me because someone had told him that I’d made a gesture referring to a blow job (WTF!), but he’d since decided that they were lying about me. He wouldn’t tell me who it was in case I decided to unleash some vengence on the lying prick.

I’ve been suffering from a head cold for the last couple of days. I dragged myself into work this morning but went home after about 45 mins to give myself a chance to recuperate.

Today I watched a erotic thriller called Three and about half of The Machinist. I also started watching The Others in Spanish (I borrowed it from someone), but the dialogue was a bit too quick for me to follow without English subtitles so I gave up. I’ll rent it in English, even though I’ve found out the ending already from evil spoilers.

On Thursday my mum and I are going to Brussells for the day. I took her there for a few days last year for her birthday, and we thought it would be nice to go back for a shopping trip.

Next Monday my former boss and I are going to see Orlando Bloom’s alien moustache at the theatre… Here’s that pic again, in case anyone missed it.

I’m going to lie down again now. Seeing that cardigan took all the fight out of me.

Welcome back to the hottest Sunday night event around!

Saucy quote: “I think sexy has nothing to
do with sex. Sexy has to do with not knowing what’s coming next.” Christopher Walken.

–

Your saucy picks for tonight are The OC actors Melinda Clarke and Peter Gallagher.

I miss The OC, especially the first couple of seasons when it was really bitchy. The series also featured a lot of eye candy, and I’ve chosen two of the older actors in the show, who were still hotties.

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It hasn’t come completely out of the blue; my mum has mentioned her feelings on my lifestyle in the past few days, but an hour or so ago she decided to have it out with me.

She said that I am acting like my life is over, because I stay in the house a lot and don’t go out much. She said that she is worrying about me, and that I wasn’t like this a year ago. A year ago I used to go to the gym, go to the cinema, etc.

She said that my dad is also worried about me because I spend a lot of time in my room and I eat a lot of junk food and sleep a lot during the day when I’m not at work.

At my age I should be going out all the time…

What they are saying is true, but I feel okay about my life at the moment. I’m not going out a lot, but I am more of an introspective person and I appreciate having time alone to think about things and to read, etc. I’m not particularly unhappy, though I admit that I’m somewhat unfulfilled and directionless. The only thing that sometimes upsets me is my inability to pursue my creative goals, and to slim down.

I do take myself out sometimes, and I do exercise sometimes, so it’s not like I’ve completely “given up on life”.

I think that this is a phase that I’m going through, and in time I will probably want to go out more and be more active. I don’t want my parents to worry about me, but I guess it’s hard for them to understand my moods and needs.

Sometimes I tell my mum that she should be more supportive of me since I’m not causing her a lot of trouble; things could be worse, I say: I could be a drug addict or an alcoholic, etc. Sure it’s not ideal that I eat the odd packet of biscuits from time to time, but I’m not hurting anyone else.

I don’t have much of a social life; some of that is my own fault for being somewhat socially awkward, and some of it is just the way that things have worked out. I don’t have many friends, and the ones I have don’t ask me to meet up with them on a regular basis. I don’t have a group of friends who I meet up with at the weekends or in the evenings (like everyone else seems to have). Some of the friends I have only seem to contact me when they want something from me.

I’m not sure what to do at this stage. If I do anything.